Back to the blog!

I've really neglected my blog..not purposely, time just flew by.


I've been on a busy, high acuity med/surg floor for 6 months, now. My patient average is 6-7. I have learned so much, but still so much more to go. Feeling much more confident and really feel like part of the team. The sunrises and sunsets are very beautiful from the 8th floor. Each day brings a whole new adventure. I may have a day that doesn't go quite as smooth as I would like, but then the next day balances it out. Besides being a wife and mother, nursing is my passion for life.


We have enjoyed the boat much more this summer, than last. Our latest trip was from one end of Cayuga to the other. (Ithaca to Aubur). We enjoyed a great, dock side lunch at the Boat Yard Grill. Hiked and climbed a six foot tree house at Cayuga Nature Center.

Planning a trip to Sampson State Park on Seneca Lake, this weekend. The weather is supposed to be perfect:)


We surprised my in-laws with a 50th anniversary dinner party at the Villa Senna, last weekend. It was really nice to have all of Jay's family together. The weather cooperated for a perfect evening. I'm blessed with wonderful in-laws.

Peaches! My peach tree is so loaded with peaches that a large branch broke from the weight. Making peach crisp and pairing that with vanilla ice cream. Promised my girls on 8NW this treat tonight.

Surprisingly, I haven't done much knitting this summer! I do have a few projects on the needles that I need to get back to. Will post some upcoming pictures.

Purchasing a camera this weekend. I've been without one for the past 6 months. Time for a me-treat!

Promises to be back sooner than later:)

MAY DAYS

Wow! Have I been neglecting this blog! I just realized that it has been almost two months since I posted. So much has been going on in the last two months...

#1. I took my boards on 4/19. So glad that this chapter of my life is now over with! I've been on my own since the end of April, off orientation, and taking a full patient load, (6-8 patients).

#2. We took a trip to DC a few weeks back. Had a wonderful time visiting the zoo and touring DC. It was especially nice to have Kelly & Mike as our official tour guides and to also finally see where they live.


#3. Logan attended his first prom. Love him with all my heart, but my oh my does he test his mama. Two weeks of school left..senioritis.


#4. Madison had her birthday on Saturday, 5-16, turning 12. Our weekend was filled with dance recitals. Another excitement, after several softball games of her not hitting the ball, she slammed the ball twice last night! woohoo! She's our artsy dancer & singer and this is her first year playing..so she isn't quite as aggressive as the other girls.



#5. Searching for the perfect knitting projects....nothing to report at this time, except that I purchased some beautiful blue/gray silky fiber..intended for a whispie summer shaw.

#6. Perennial gardens look pretty good. My hubs is getting to be quite the gardener..and he's getting pretty good at not mistaking my plants for weeds.

#7. A new favorite way to make potatoes: boil red potatoes, unpeeled. Roast garlic (unpeeled) in aluminum foil until soft. Sautee fresh chives from the garden in butter. Add chives & roasted garlic paste to potatoes. Salt & pepper. YUM. My family loves these potatoes.

#8. Can't wait for our wine trip on 5/30, with friends! Pulling the boat to the marina in Watkins Glen, then a day of wining followed by sunset boating and dinner on the shore.



Love this pic of Emily in front of my forget-me-nots..she loves to come visit Aunt Karen.


Happy Memorial Weekend, my friends! Remeber to give thanks to the Veterans. I'm thinking of my friend, Susan. Her son, a Marine, was killed in Iraq, March, 2007.

TGIF~

Well, friends, it's been awhile..time got away from me! Madison is spending the night with her Gram and Logan is on a date....oh, forgot...teens don't call it "a date" anymore...I think they call it "hanging out". Quiet night for Jay and I featuring the movie "Bella", popcorn, cabernet and a brewsky.

Survived my first week of night shift, decided it's definitely my for take. Had today off, and working my first weekend, tomorrow.

SPRING! Captured this picture of a sure sign of spring..mud and bright colored rubber boots!

Kid update: Logan joined track, throwing shot put. Mads continues with dance, Towanda Children's Choir and soon will start her first year in softball. I'm looking forward to watching ball games again..miss the days of "Little League".

Knitting - none! Yes, missing it. Fibers will start flying once I get the boards over. I've got some projects in mind for a few expecting mamas.

I've been experiencing the new world of Facebook. This blog is my baby, but Facebook is a great way to reconnect with the past. I was very excited to find a childhood friend/neighbor on FB!

When "Auntie" gets to spoil little Anna, it always makes me smile:)

My cousin, Kelly, will be running a 1/2 Marathon in DC, tomorrow. She's an ole pro at marathons, but the new twist is that she is 16 weeks pregnant......you go girl!!!!!

Just an update

It's the end of a weekend..and almost the end of the month..where has time gone?? A little update from life at the Abbott home: We made turkey chowder today from the family cookbook that my friend, Kay, gave me. Fabulous! I made Martha Stewart ginger cookies today. You must try them if you like molasses. I plan to start a walking program tomorrow.....seriously. Jay and I went on a dinner/movie date Saturday night. We saw "The Reader". Karen didn't like the movie. (Think it's being the mother of a teenage boy thing). Wish I picked door number 2..Slumdog (it took the Oscar). Miss Madison enjoyed attending a slumber/birthday party....Logan went to a birthday party as well...but the motherly instinct tells me that it wasn't cake & ice cream he was enjoying...Am I really old enough to have a 17 year old?? The dog is shedding in a very furious way. Is this a sign that spring is coming? Running the cleaner on a daily basis.
Three weeks into my nursing role and I LOVE IT STILL! Having so much fun:) For instance: I wasn't sure how to collect a urine sample from a catheter, so a care partner showed me. We went in to a gentleman's room around 2 Am to collect our sample. He wakes up and says "well..isn't this something...trying to steal urine from a guys tap system". This just struck us sooo funny...still makes me laugh! HA! I put in an NG tube this week...and I put in a male foley cath all by myself (slick as butta). Also had a real good IV stick. Everything went very smooth with one poke. One more week of 3-3's & 3-11's, then doing a week of days, then on to nights. Home until 2 tomorrow. The plan is to study for the boards...and take a walk.

Time Fog..

One of the biggest obstacles of nursing, thus far, is trying to stay acclimated to what day it is...I spent all day, yesterday, thinking it was Saturday! It wasn't until later in the day that the light bulb came on and I realized that I had better get some school clothes washed.
All of Saturday and part of Sunday were spent fighting a headache, (which I very seldom get). Sunday afternoon involved helping Madison make "I-Pod Valentines". Thanks to PeaKnit for sharing these trendy Valentines. Turned out really cute and just perfect for an 11 year old.I taught Madison how to make "monkey bread", which we pulled out of the oven just as Jay's parents stopped in for a visit. Hot tea and monkey bread...yum!

Started knitting up a quick "drop-stitch" scarf with some hand-dyed yarn that I purchased a year ago and wasn't quite sure what to use it on.

Enjoy this beautiful sun-filled day:)

4:15 am, cold pizza, all is quiet

Winding down after coming off a 3P - 3:30A shift. Busy night...and I STILL LOVE IT! Let's see..I started an IV tonight, completed a dressing change of a status post left foot amputee, (first time for this newby and yes..I was very nervous when taking off that last piece of gauze)..that later tried to get out of bed, twice. Love being busy, wearing scrubs & NB sneakers to work..and I get a work-out while earning money:) One more week of this second shift, then on to do some first & third. Second is hard on the family time, and definetly not my pick for a shift..but it's ok during this learning phase of my position.

All is quiet here at the Abbott home. Looking forward to spending time with my family this weekend. No big plans...just little "simples" such as making valentines with mads, baking, playing games, enjoying the 45 degree weather that is supposed to hit, jay's pancakes, knitting, narrowing down the planning of our disney trip, picking out paint for the craft/utility room & downstairs bath and just having fun:) Happy Weekend All! ~I don't return to work until Tuesday at 3~

PS - Go RED! Friday was national Go RED day. A day to fight the number one killer of woman - heart disease. Buy a beautiful "red dress" pin and proceeds are donated to the fight against heart disease.

It's time to sleep.

STEELERS!

Saying a big WOOHOO from a household of Steeler's fans! What a game!!

Love it!

I'm still alive! Started the new position on the med/surg unit Monday, I worked 3p to 3a..most of the night flew by..very busy. Second shift definetly isn't the shift for me, since I don't get to see the kids before they go to bed, but it will only be for a few weeks, for the experience. I will be rotating around shifts through my preceptor program, to be sure to get all experiences. As of last night, I had two patients and getting the hang of using the computer system to deliver meds. Within two days, I have gotten to insert a catheter, ng tube, try my hand at an IV start, dress a wound, etc! Definetly can see why med surg is a good place for a new nurse to get experience. LOVE wearing scrubs..comfy!
Have Friday and the weekend off. Plan to pick the kids up after school and head up to the unit to pick up my first paycheck. Thought they would enjoy seeing where mom works.

Finished another pair of Evangaline mitts for a friend. Currently working on a pair of fisherman's wool mittens..just plain..my first mittens.

A mid-week update

Well, three days into the new position and I'm loving it so far! Of course, I have only hit orientation (classroom), and will continue this for the remainder of the week and next Monday. Will finally "hit the floor" next Tuesday. I went up to visit the 8th floor, med/surg, where I will be working......let's just say that I will definetly be getting my exercise! So far, I have met an array of very enthusiastic nurses, confirming that the pathways in nursing are endless. I hope to be taking my boards by mid-March, and then will decide on which college to continue the education trek.

Enjoying spending time with Madison..back to being "dance mom", as I shuffle her to her back-to-back Wed. night lessons and children's choir.

Knitting another pair of Evangalines..love those things!

Baby it's cold outside!

It's actually 27 degrees today..much warmer than the previous days! Finished a couple of knitting projects, including the wrist warmers, toast, which went to my friend Kay, for her birthday. ..I made her model them for a picture, when all of us got together at Applebees for dinner the other night.

Finished the Evangaline mitts and had Melissa model them for a pic, as she enjoys a glass of "Fran Cat" from Pickering Winery.

Today is the last day off, before the new job, tomorrow. The last 10 days have flown by, but I'm really excited to finally start my new career. I was able to get on the road to being "organized" while I was off.

50 questions...

Fifty questions per day, as of today. Hopefully, I can increase that to 75/day. Starting to prepare for my boards. ..I have definitely been on a "honeymoon" since the final exam..time to get back to the grind and tackle these questions! I have sent for my temporary practice permit, but have a goal to take my boards by mid-March. Using a calendar to mark the number of questions being studied, each day.

A full week off and it's flying by quickly. Managed to clean out and organize the hall closet and bathroom closet, today.

Knitting: Met a friend last evening for a glass of wine and some knitting lessons. I'm sure she will get the hang of it quickly, as she was taught as a child. I finished my friend's birthday gift and will give it to her this evening. Meeting the girls for dinner:)

On the needles now, is the second Evangaline. I knit one several semesters ago and was so proud to show my classmates my first cable pattern, however...I never got around to knitting the second one..so here we go:)

Lucy's finally done:)

With a winter blizzard that hit yesterday morning, it seemed the perfect opportunity to "cozy in" and finish my mother's Lucy bag. Using almost two skeins of Nature Spun wool in "pepper", I really like how she turned out. I have made several of these bags, and no two are the same. I love how the Lucy bag fits so nice on the arm. My project for today is going to be a "wristlet" version of a Lucy...probably using 1/2 skein of wool.

The girls and I spent some time at "Brewed Awakenings" coffee shop yesterday. Madison's friend, Katie brought her knitting along and I taught her to bind off. The owner of the shop came over to our table and said, "this is great, more kids need to be doing stuff like this, rather than always texting or playing videos." I told her that she had the perfect little shop to have a "knitting night" and she thought that was a great idea! Notice in the picture that MY daughter takes no interest in knitting..she knows how, but at the moment is not interested:(. Katie, on the other hand, spent another night with us and started another scarf!


Everything is white and the snow is still lightly coming down. I have a feeling that today's agenda will include sled riding

Do you remember when...

Remember when..you were 11 and the funnest thing was to have your friend ride the bus home and spend the night! It's Friday night and I have 2 eleven year olds that are having a ball..so far it's been a dinner of Chinese take-out, karaoke and when I just peaked in her room they had a pedicure center set up, complete with my bubbling foot mas sager!

The last time Madison's friend was here, I taught her to knit...I was so impressed when she returned this weekend with a very long knitted scarf, ready to learn how to bind off!

Tomorrow morning holds a trip to a quaint little coffee shop with the girls, a hair apt for Mads and then roller skating in the afternoon.

My last day.........bittersweet

Although I am very excited to get my nursing career started, it was hard leaving the comforts of the past six years. I've made some amazing friends and we vow to stay connected. They were all so supportive during my trek through nursing school. I was thrown a wonderful "farewell" luncheon, yesterday. I wanted to leave them all with something for their desks, something "calming" for when the office gets hectic...I stayed up until 1:30 am making "tranquility stones". Each person got 4 stones: peace, rest, relax & calm. I think I may be addicted to making these!

Early Morning Bus Rides

The bus pulls up at 6:35 am, yes..6:35 am. Out the door they go with hot cocoa, protein drinks & toasted egg sandwiches wrapped in waxed paper. The last two mornings have been beautiful since we've been "practicing" getting organized. The big changes will come in a few weeks when I start my nursing career. The first two weeks will be day shift, going through trainings, HR stuff and then a week in the lab. After that, I think I want to try the night shift..major changes for this 8-4 office girl.

Notice they both have smiles as they head out to catch their Grandpa's bus, in the pitched dark. So far, all is running smooth:)

My first "real" stethoscope

Thanks to my Mom, I will be receiving a Littman Classic II SE Stethoscope, seal blue in color, with my name engraved. The stethoscope from nursing school was falling apart. Since performing assessments will be my major duty as a nurse, a good stethoscope is a must.

This week will be my last week at the counseling center. I'm going to need a lot of tissues, come Thursday. I've made some wonderful friends. Haven't even started to clean out my office.

Productive weekend for Jay and Mads - they put a 24 x 22 ceiling in our family room. Madison put many of the tiles in, as Jay handed them to her..little trooper! We are all very excited to get our downstairs completed, as we really need the added space.

This will be our first week to "practice" getting super organized for school mornings. I helped Madison pick out five outfits and put them on hangers, papers have been signed, bookbags, coats & gloves are ready to go. I've steamed five shirts for Logan..now to get him up 1/2 hour early, since he insists on showering in the a.m.

Mom's Lucy Bag...she's coming along and should be off the needles & felted by mid-week. Purchased a beautiful broach for the front. Can't wait to get it to her (a late Christmas present that she knows about)

We finished out the weekend by going to see a matinee of Disney's Bedtime Stories...Karen was very, very glad when the movie was over!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year to all! Wishing everyone a fresh new year, filled with happiness and health!
Thought it would be a good day to change the name of my blog. I will continue to blog, but can't promise that I will get a post on, every day. I'm still on the "honeymoon" of finishing nursing school, enjoying my family & friends. Will have some upcoming pictures of a few knitted items soon. Hoping to get a few more friends knitting this year. Gave a gift of knitting accessories to a friend the other evening and promised her an upcoming knitting lesson over a few glasses of wine. Still have one friend that is trying her damnedest to knit, but her knuckles turn white with tension...kinda defeats the r-e-l-a-x-a-t-i-o-n of knitting. Then there's my friend, Renee..who still patiently is waiting for me to show her how to knit the handles on her Lucy bag. This weekend, I promise!!

Feeling some anxiety of leaving my old job..last day being Jan. 8th. Mostly due to the fact that I just adore my co-workers and have made some great friends. I must admit the other anxiety is going from a job that I know everything about and could do it with my eyes closed...to a brand new job as a nurse. I guess it's a combination of anxiety/excitement.

To my nursing sistas - can't wait to hear how you all are doing!!! We must get together in a few months to tell our nursing stories. The PA girl will head to NY. Honestly, one night after getting out of work, I automatically started heading up Rt 17...it's hard to break old habits. Remember girls, if it gets too stressful, pick up some knitting needles and knit your a-- off, it's a great stress reliever:)
Dates~Jay and I went to the Grovedale Winery, (a very impressive place with some great cab), last weekend, and then out dancing. Looking forward to another hot date on January 10th.
Taking the kids to Barnes & Nobles on Saturday to let them spend their gift cards..I wish I had my own gift card to B&N..my fav store! While they are shopping, I'll have my own agenda of checking out the newest med/surg pocket references and knitting books.

Marbles~ remember the old fashioned marble board? We pulled that out New Year's Eve, (the one my Dad made in shop class), and played a few rounds. Forgot how fun it is. The only thing is that I'm impatient and am always telling someone "it's your turn..go". I got a joy out of knocking people back to home:) Marbles...the highlight of our New Year's Eve.

Something new that I'm starting ~ 365 days of flickr..which means I will take a picture every day and post in a flickr account, on this blog. By this time next year, it will be fun for me to reflect back on each day's pic.

Have a super weekend, everyone!

Job Acceptance

Hope everyone had a joyous and peaceful Christmas. Ours was wonderful, but I have to admit that I was utterly one of those last minute shoppers..racing to a few stores before they closed Christmas Eve..not cool. Definitely won't happen next year. We did have a nice Christmas Eve with Jay's parents/family and it was very nice to open our gifts Christmas morning, host a nice breakfast for Jay's parents and then spend the entire day at home before heading to my parents in the evening.
By the way..The Christmas Shoes was the winner for the most popular Christmas movie on my poll. Now let me tell you, I purchased the sequel to this movie called "The Christmas Blessing" which is about the little boy all grown up. We didn't get a chance to watch it until last evening and I was literly sobbing at the end of this movie.

I have accepted a position as a med/surge nurse and will start January 19th! After being interviewed for two different positions and taking some time to think about each position and what was offered, I decided that I wanted to start out my nursing career in med/surg, as I will gain the most experience with this position. I still want to be an oncology nurse, but I feel that it is so import to get a good foundation in med/surg. I valued the opinions of nurses in my family, as well as co-workers/friends that are nurses. I know I'm making the right decision..it just feels right to me. My last day at my current job will be Jan. 8th..I will miss so many people there. Taking 10 days off before starting my new job. This will be my time to get my house organized.

At this point, I am just having fun! Knitting, reading, playing games with the kids, catching up with friends, going on dates with Jay (dancing this evening..woohoo) and a little shopping, too. Mads, Amy and I are headed to the mall this morning to exchange and purchase a few items.

I got to shop for new nursing scrubs the other day, thanks to my Aunt. I have my first set of "trendy" scrubs!!

Have a great weekend!

The ultimate WOOHOO

Nursing school is officially over and it feels wonderful! I'm still trying to train myself not to head up Route 17 as soon as I leave work..it's been such a routine for so long. I will definitely miss my classmates, but several of us have vowed to stay in touch. With the last class ending during such a busy month, several of our classmates were not able to meet for dinner after the final. Although it would have been perfect for all of us to have gotten together, the handful of us that did, had a great time.

I've been asked by several blog readers, to keep this blog running. I'm in the midst of a transition, a new chapter in my life will soon start, but I will do my best to keep bloggin'. I have interviewed for two different positions and spent this past weekend weighing out the differences of each position. I feel like a race horse that is awaiting the gate to open! The ultimate hurdle still needs to be surpassed..preparing and passing my boards. After taking a breath and enjoying Christmas, I will start the Kaplan Review Program. My goal is to get licensed within 12 weeks, commiting to two hours of review per day, after 12/25.

Seems nice to have more time with my family. Tonight, we were sprawled out on the floor, playing Sorry and Madison already has another game lined up for tomorrow evening.

I feel very lucky & fortunate to have such wonderful family, friends, co-workers and church family. So many words of empowerment have been sent my way in the past three years. My husband being my biggest supporter. I couldn't have done it without all of them. Thank you with all my heart. My dream has come true.

The day I've been waiting for

Well, it's finally here. The last day of nursing school. An emotional evening ahead. It was so sweet Monday night. I arrived at class to find that each set of two desks held a beautiful box. No explanation as to who it was from, just perfectly set upon our desk to greet us. In the box, were two beautiful wrapped dove ornaments..one for each of us. Enveloping the doves, were cards explaining the meaning of the dove. One of my classmates, as busy as she has been, went out of her way to a specialty shop and purchased these wonderful gifts.

All of us are going to Applebees for dinner, after the final. I will be back, later this evening, with pictures. In the past three years, we didn't find a lot of "extra" time to spend with each other, but we spent so much time in the classroom & clinicals together. We started with a large group of 32, ending with an intimate group of 15. See you tonight, girls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Angels & My Dancer

Nearing the end of an entertaining and busy weekend. I haven't had much time to study for the final, but will be plugging away at it, this evening and the next three days.

Madison, Emily, Gabby & Lily were little choir angels Saturday evening at the church.

We enjoyed "An Old Fashioned Christmas Pageant" at our church, Saturday night...complete with a real donkey. That Lily is soo cute!

Another entertainment was Madison's Christmas dance recital this afternoon. I wasn't able to take pictures during the actual recital, so we snapped a few by our tree.

With the flowers that her Daddy got her....

Finally able to share a picture of my fun purse - pattern from the book One Skein Wonders. Knit & felted in wool/mohair. Isn't it just screaming Christmas Party!!! I hope to put it to good use a few times this month!
To all of you, have a wonderful week! For me, the upcoming week is one that I have waited on for quite a while.

Family Portrait

The last family portrait that we had taken was in 1998 - ten years ago. That ten year chunk of time seemed to go by so quickly. I'm quite happy with the job that Sears did, and with all the coupons/specials, we were able to order a nice amount of pictures for under $75. We left the mall around 9:15 pm and stopped for a late dinner.

October came & went and I had wanted a nice picture of Jay & I for our 20th anniversary. I like the informality of this picture.

I also wanted a picture of the kids together. We ended up ordering three different poses, but the one at the end is my favorite as it reflects the closeness that those two have for each other. Thank you, Amy, for prompting me to get & keep the apt. for pictures..and it wasn't as stressful as I thought it would be to color coordinate..you are the best!

Just days away!

It's been awhile since I've taken the time to update the blog..this would be because I'm flyin' by the seat of my pants, it seems! Officially down to just three nights of class left. A Mirco final test tomorrow evening & then Monday & Wed. next week for Nursing. That's it!! DONE! YIPPEE!

Yesterday, I spent the day observing a Hospice nurse in the community. This will definitely be in my future, once I gain experience.
Christmas shopping? nowhere near done. Wrapping?..yea.right! Cookies?..notta one Decorating? partially, but no tree yet. Somehow, it will get done. I'll get my reality check this Saturday evening, when I'm reminded of what it's all about, as our Church has it's "Old Fashioned Christmas Pageant"..can't wait for this! Sunday will follow with the Christmas Cantata, which I love lisening to. Sunday evening is Madison's Christmas Dance Recital. Jay has been the "dance Dad" so far this year. I've been totally out of the loop. Looking so forward to watching her dance. A very entertaining weekend ahead!!
I did finish a knitting project with a few more needed before Christmas. This one happens to be for me and is screaming "Christmas Party". *Pictures coming soon..still searching for my camera cable:) Knit from the book Oneskein, using bulky wool/mohair. Very fun and knit up quick. Did take three cycles of hot water washes to get the felting that I like.
Scheduled vacation day tomorrow. Day will be split to study for Micro exam & Nursing final.
Major accomplishment - I got my Christmas cards out early! Woohoo!

He's king of the man shed tonight

I called Jay on his cell at about 4:30, and got this response, "can I call you back, I just shot a buck"..in a low, panting voice. I totally interrupted the adrenaline pumping man hunt. Then I heard those words that a wife doesn't like to hear.."nice rack"..this translates to "deer on wall"..ugh! Glad they have that new man shed..will make a nice place for their "trophies".

Funny thing..I went to pull in the driveway this evening, and there stands a buck in the middle of my flower garden.

After hitting the "refresh" button all the live long day, my grade finally popped up around 3:30...breathing a sigh of relief this evening! Home from class by 8:30 tonight..done for the week:)

I couldn't resist showing this cutie-pie picture of my four nieces. Looks like they were helping Grandma with her tree. Can't wait until I have more time to spend with them.

Test from hell

One of the ugliest nursing exams, this evening. Everyone pretty much looked "spent" after taking this exam. So much reading for each question..and still only 1 minute per question. Have no idea what the outcome will be until grade is posted tomorrow. One more, just one more to go!
I actually drove home in complete silence this evening..no music. Stress headache.

One more night..my partner and I are doing a power point presentation on diphtheria. Looking SO forward to weekend. Not a lot going on, but will finally get some time to get the house in order and put up a few decorations. Since I had a rough night, Jay aked me on a date for Saturday night..my choice and I picked Twigs, but not before going to Nimble Hill Winery.

Madison was beaming tonight and couldn't wait to tell me that she had no homework, since she was one of the top three with the highest math test grade. Wish Logan had that much enthusiasm..